K.L. ASKS...
What’s the polite way to ask to be removed
from a group text? The number of messages
often becomes overwhelming, and the topic
stops being relevant.I would simply mute the conversation. You don’t
have to make a big production out of it, nobody
will be the wiser, and you won’t be interrupted
further by political GIFs or a debate over the
exact meaning of “snappy casual.” On an iPhone,
open the group message, tap the top of the screen,
hit the Info icon, then switch on Hide Alerts.
On an Android phone, tap the three dots on the
upper right of the message screen, then turn off
the Notifications button. Done and dusted—and
thank you for the reminder to protect our time
from unwanted distractions.R.B. ASKS...
I have a dear friend whose smell is very dis-
tracting. I don’t know what it is—maybe
body odor or a food he’s been cooking. I
want to say something but don’t feel it’s
my place to do so. What do you think?You’re right! There’s no way to point out odor
without offending him, especially since it
could be caused by illness, diet, or a number
of other factors. So employ compassionate
problem-solving: To mitigate the smell, try
chewing strong mint gum, dousing yourself in
your favorite perfume, dotting an essential oil
under your nose, or meeting your friend out
in the fresh air. That way you can cherish this
relationship without compromising your com-
fort or embarrassing your friend.L.S. ASKS...
I’d like to host neighbors for dinner, but
some of them are so overweight that I’m
afraid my vintage dining room chairs won’t
support them. I’m worried that offering
them different chairs would look obvious.
What should I do?I shared your question with my friend Susan,
who said, “Nobody fat wants to break a chair.
I’ve done it!” In other words, your guests will
likely worry way more about your spindly fur-
niture than you will. So make sure you have
some better alternatives. Sturdy, armless chairs
are best for both durability and comfort. Susan
noted that a couch can also work, which makes
a casual buffet in the family room another good
option. In the end, inclusivity is most import-
ant, whatever form it takes. As Susan said, “the
biggest gift is the host’s direct, matter-of-fact
desire to put their fat guest at ease. If in doubt,
ask, ‘Is there anything I can do to make you
more comfortable?’ ”HAVE AN ETIQUETTE
QUESTION?
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[email protected].APRIL 2020 REAL SIMPLE 770420MOD.V1.indd 77 FINAL 2/21/20 3:18 PM