94 WHAT EVERY BODY IS SAYING
and neck. These are forms of shielding that transmit that the person is
slightly insecure at that moment.
I was in a supermarket checkout line waiting for the woman in front
of me to conclude her transaction. She was evidently using a debit card,
and the machine kept rejecting it. Each time she swiped the card and
entered her pin number, she would await the machine’s response with
her arms crossed across her chest, until finally she gave up and walked
away, exasperated. Each time the card was rejected, her arms and grip
got tighter, a clear sign that her annoyance and discomfort were escalat-
ing (see figures 33 and 34).
Children can be seen to cross or lock their arms across their bodies
when upset or being defiant, even at an early age. These shielding behav-
iors come in a variety of forms—from arms crisscrossed over the belly to
crossing the arms high with hands grasping opposite shoulders.
Students often ask me if it means there is something wrong with
them if they sit in class and cross their arms in front of themselves. The
question is not whether something is wrong, nor does this posture mean
they are blocking the teacher out; arms intertwined across the front is a
In public, many of us comfortably cross
our arms while waiting or listening to a
speaker. Around the house we rarely sit
this way unless something is bothering
us, like waiting for a late ride.Crossed arms with hands tightly gripping
the arms is definitely an indication of
discomfort.Fig. 33 Fig. 34