GETTING A GRIP 161Microexpressions of the HandsA microgesture is a very brief nonverbal behavior that occurs when a per-
son is attempting to suppress a normal response to a negative stimulus
(Ekman, 2003, 15). In these circumstances, the more reflexive and short-
lived the behavior is, the more truthful it tends to be. For instance, let’s
imagine the boss tells an employee he has to help out and work this
weekend because someone is sick. On hearing the news, the employee’s
nose crinkles or a slight smirk appears suddenly but briefly. These mi-
crogestures of dislike are very accurate displays of how the person truly
feels. Similarly, our hands can display microexpressions that may sur-
prise you (see box 44).
CHANGES IN HAND BEHAVIORS CAN REVEAL
IMPORTANT INFORMATIONAs with all nonverbal behaviors, sudden alterations in hand motion sug-
gest an abrupt change in someone’s thoughts and feelings. When lovers
rapidly move their hands away from each other during a meal, it is a sign
that something negative has just happened. Hand withdrawal may hap-
pen in seconds, but it is a very accurate real-time indicator of the person’s
feelings.
Gradual hand withdrawals are also worthy of note. A while ago I was
invited to dinner by a married couple with whom I had been friends
since our college days. We were chatting around the table at the end of
the meal when the topic of finances arose. My friends revealed that they
were experiencing money problems. As the wife complained about how
“the money seemed to just disappear,” likewise, her husband’s hands si-
multaneously and gradually disappeared from the tabletop. As she spoke,
I watched him slowly withdraw his hands until they rested, finally, on
his lap. This sort of distancing is a cue indicative of psychological flight
(part of our limbic survival mechanism) that often occurs when we are