168 W H A T EVERY BODY IS SAYING
see how tense Bill’s jaw got when I made that proposal?” Only to hear
his partner respond, “No, I didn’t catch that” (see box 45). We miss facial
cues because we have been taught not to stare and/or because we concen-
trate more on what is being said than on how it is being said.
Keep in mind that people often work at hiding their emotions, mak-
ing them more difficult to detect if we are not conscientious observers. In
addition, facial cues may be so fleeting—microgestures—that they are
difficult to pick up. In a casual conversation, these subtle behaviors may
not be of much significance, but in an important interpersonal interac-
tion (between lovers, parents and children, business associates, or at an
employment interview), such seemingly minor displays of tension may
reflect deep emotional conflict. Since our conscious brains may try to
mask our limbic emotions, any signals that reach the surface are criti-
cal to detect, as they may yield a more accurate picture of a person’s
deep-rooted thoughts and intentions.
Although many joyous facial expressions are easily and universally
recognized, these nonverbal tells may also be suppressed or concealed for
Squinting, furrowing of the forehead, and
facial contortions are indicative of distress
or discomfort.Fig. 59