CHAPTER 9 Style and Clarity^201
In addition, vagueness in writing persists because we insist on overqualifying
terms. If something is clear, is perfectly clear clearer? No. Why not just drop the
overqualifi cation perfectly?
Here are more examples of imprecise overqualifi cations. How would you sim-
plify them?
- He utterly rejected my proposal.
- The route drawing was quite precise.
- My computer is radically new.
- We thought their solution was quite imaginative.
5. My dog is completely devoted to the children.
You probably realize that the overqualifi cations—utterly,quite,radically, and com-
pletely—add little meaning. Delete them!
Another obstacle to clarity is using wordy expressions instead of a single word.
What one word can you substitute for these phrases?
as of this time at this time
at the present time at present
our current belief is at this point
after further consideration at this point in time
upon further refl ection
By the time you fi nished reading this list, it probably occurred to you that all the
expressions referred to now. Any one of these expressions might be avoided by
using the simple word now:
Wordy:At this time, we’re not hiring.Clearer: We’re not hiring now.Look at the other wordy expressions that substitute for the word then:
during the past at that date
up until that time at that time
at that point in that period
at that point in time during the past
as of that time