them in some form for life. These children, denied
the love of one or both parents, carry “feelings of
emptiness where that love should have been—often
for the rest of their lives. The rejected live with an
emotional hole in the center of their being” (Evoy
72). They experience guilt, depression, anger, hos-
tility, and aggression, and they actively seek out,
sometimes in dangerous ways, situations in which
they are valued (66). In Louise Erdrich’s Love
Medicine, for instance, June Morrisey is rejected
by her mother as a young child. As she grows into a
woman, she exhibits many of the signs listed above.
She tries to hang herself during a game with her
cousins, convinced she has no real worth. She cannot
truly accept the genuine love Marie gives her, fearful
as she is of yet another rejection. June lives her entire
life aggressively and angrily hurting others, and she
frequently puts herself in precarious situations, one
of which ultimately kills her.
In Mark Twain’s adventures oF huckLe-
berry Finn, Huck is rejected by his father and then
again by the society at large. While he is a resilient,
confident child, he believes himself to be, quite
naturally, worth less than other children. He seems
to be most comfortable when he is alone and acting
independently. While this may be part of his per-
ceived charm (and also why he is seen as so incor-
rigible by the townspeople), Twain’s characterization
here highlights Huck’s state of rejection. Children
should not seek to be independent; they should not
have to. Childhood is naturally a state in which we
should seek the help and guidance of our elders.
When we are shown, as Huck was, that the help and
guidance is either not forthcoming or will lead to
more pain, we learn to stop asking for it.
For Huck, rejection made him (rightly) suspi-
cious of society at large. He simply did not trust
people, even those who claimed to want to help him.
A pattern of rejection can force victims into irratio-
nal states, where they see and feel rejected from all
angles. Mark Leary points out that feelings of rejec-
tion can become so pervasive that even “slights or
inconsiderate behavior” can be taking as wholesale
rejection, further driving the rejected person away
from society at large. In Native Son, we see this in
Bigger Thomas. Society has rejected him because
he is black; that is his reality. However, his mother
is angry with him because of what she sees as his
laziness and lack of ambition. Bigger simply adds
this to the mountain of rejection he already feels. In
addition, when Mary and her boyfriend are kind to
him, he does not know how to take that behavior.
Rejection has inured him to real feelings. He, like
many of the rejected, must close his “real self ” off.
Of all the varieties of rejection, romantic rejec-
tion, such as the type felt by Miss Havisham, pro-
vides perhaps the most immediate, crushing blow.
Romantic rejections are difficult to weather because
if we are hard-wired to create connections, the
connections we seek with potential mates are the
most important connections of all. Being rejected
on those occasions makes the least sense to us
biologically. Indeed, when Marianne is rejected by
Willoughby in Jane Austen’s sense and sensibiL-
ity, her devastation sends her into a physical illness
that almost kills her. Marianne’s whole sense of self
and sense of purpose are shaken. Even though Wil-
loughby is revealed to be a cad, Marianne’s grief is
not generated by his obvious mistreatment of her,
but rather by the loss of what she thought was a
perfect love. As much as she later learns about him,
she cannot bring herself to truly blame him.
Being rejected by others is an experience that can
change human beings at their core. It can call into
questions what we think we know about our own
intelligence, beauty, personality, and overall worth.
Rejection can absolutely devastate us, causing us
to hide our real selves and operate as mere shells
of human beings. Because these experiences are so
powerful, it is no wonder literature explores the sub-
ject again and again.
See also Kureishi, Hanif: buddha oF sub-
urbia, the; Shakespeare, William: tweLFth
niGht.
FURTHER READING
Evoy, John Joseph. The Rejected. University Park, Pa.:
Pennsylvania State University Press, 1981.
Fiske, Susan T., and Mariko Yamamoto. “Coping with
Rejection.” In Interpersonal Rejection, edited by
Mark Leary, 185–198. Oxford: Oxford University
Press, 2001.
Holy Bible. New International Version. New York:
Biblica, 1967.
90 rejection