For example, if you feel that you are undesirable to him, you'll
write out. “You are undesirable to him” and then next to that
belief, you list all the evidence that supports your cri cal voice
telling you that you are undesirable. Then on a separate sheet,
you'll again list all of your nega ve and cri cal beliefs, but this
me, You are going to list all the evidence that disproves it. The
evidence goes against this cri cal belief. So, following the same
example, you are going to list all of the evidence that shows that
you are desired by him. And you are going to write this as the
more realis c and compassionate evalua on of yourself. In most
cases, the evidence will show that your cri cal voice is false. You
are not, in fact, undesired, etc.
A er making this second list, you'll use this list to write a
paragraph or two that summarizes why your cri cal beliefs are
false, you are going to summarize all of the evidence that
disproves your nega ve / cri cal beliefs. Make sure you read and
reread this flashcard every day. Make a copy of it and keep it with
you at all mes.
And these beliefs aren’t going to just disappear. In fact, one of the
biggest obstacles you’ll face is when you s ll accept the old
nega ve and cri cal beliefs that you’ve told yourself. When you
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