- Solvable. Helena and Jonathan can resolve this issue in a number
of ways. Perhaps they could switch off weekly between dancing class
and Helena's girls' night out. Or maybe her friends would be willing
to switch the night. Or Jonathan could find another dancing class on
another night or on the weekend. Or one of them could simply agree
not to push it. - Solvable. Roger just needs to spend more time with his son so he
can get up to speed on his care. And Penny needs to back off and let
Roger approach baby care his way. Because this issue isn't related to
deep-seated needs either of them has, it can be readily solved
through compromise. - Perpetual. This problem probably started out as a situational one
about housecleaning and organization. Perhaps Jim and Thea have
different tolerance levels for clutter, dirt, and how planned out one's
life should be. But because they haven't found a compromise position
about running their house, they have continued to argue about these
differences. Thea has come to feel her husband doesn't value or
respect her role, while he feels that she's not holding up her end of
the marriage by keeping the household well organized.
The argument has become about their mutual resentment rather than
about housekeeping. - Perpetual. Brian and Allyssa have different emotional styles. He
tends to be volatile, meaning that he's very passionate and "out there"
with his emotions. Allyssa prefers to discuss issues quietly and
rationally. When Brian starts yelling at her, she feels overwhelmed
and quickly becomes flooded. Since emotional style is part of one's
personality neither of them is likely to change. But by becoming
aware of and respecting each other's emotional style, they can find an
approach to conflict resolution they are both comfortable with. - Perpetual. At the core Irene and Kurt have different emotional
needs. The huge change in their marriage that was created by their
child's birth has thrown what they need from each other out of sync.
ann
(Ann)
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