(^) There is another aspect of your child’s knowledge of himself.
What attitudes toward himself does he evidence? Is he shy or
confident? Is he arrogant or diffident? Is he chained by fears? Is he
able to extend himself to others? Does he have a false dependence on
others? Does he feel better than others or does he feel inadequate
around others?
(^) Harold, a first-grader in my acquaintance, is a relationship junkie.
Everything he does is vested with relationship implications. When he
sits in the reading circle he is interacting more with those around him
than with the reading material. Lining up for recess is a process of
jockeying for the recognition of someone. Seatwork time is made
meaningful by racing with someone to see who finishes first. (It
doesn’t even matter whether they know he is racing.) His thoughts
about relationships with girls are sexually loaded and laden with
baggage a 7-year-old should never carry.
(^) A skillful teacher is helping Harold’s parents to understand their
son. He is helping them see that Harold is crippled by needing
relationships in an idolatrous manner. Harold must understand that
only God can slake the thirst of his soul for relationship. Scores of
children exhibit clear, lifelong patterns of need that are never
understood by them or their parents. They grow up to be enslaved to
barré
(Barré)
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