influences.
(^) Since it is the Godward orientation of your child’s heart that
determines his response to life, you may never conclude that his
problems are simply a lack of maturity. Selfishness is not outgrown.
Rebellion against authority is not outgrown. These things are not
outgrown because they are not reflective of immaturity but rather of
the idolatry of your child’s heart.
(^) Young Albert was a deceitful child. He sneaked around behind his
father’s back. He lied even when it was not advantageous. Often he
would steal money from his parents. His father insisted on
interpreting his behavior as immaturity. Albert was immature, but
that was not the reason he was untrustworthy. The reason he could not
be trusted was that he was a sinner. Al was trying to make sense out
of life without God. In the idolatry of his rebellion against God’s
authority and his determination to be his own authority, he had
become untrustworthy. Albert’s dad was unable to help his son until
he began to see that Al’s behavior reflected a heart that had defected
from God.
The Importance of Godward Orientation
(^) Biblical stories show that shaping influences are not the whole
story. Think of Joseph. His childhood experience was far from ideal.
His mother died while he was young. He was his father’s favorite. His
dreams inflamed his brothers’ hatred. He was further alienated from
them by his father’s gift of a coat that set him apart as their authority.
His brothers betrayed him. He was thrown into a pit. Opportunistic
slave traders bought him to profit from his resale value. He was
double-crossed in Potiphar’s house despite his honor and integrity. He
was imprisoned. Even there he was forsaken by those whom he had
helped. Here was a man you would expect to be bitter, cynical,
resentful, and angry. If man is only the sum total of influences that
shape him, that would have been the result. Instead, what do we find?