the return-evil-with-evil pattern. Some parents teach their child to
ignore a bully. But is either advice biblical? Not really. God says to
return good for evil, all the while entrusting ourselves to the
protective care of a God who says, “It is mine to avenge; I will repay”
(Romans 12:19).
(^) Biblical counsel leads your children to entrust themselves to
God’s care and protection. It teaches sensitivity to the needs of the
offender. “If your enemy is hungry, feed him” (Romans 12:20). It
reminds her that God says to bless those who curse us. In short, it is
counsel that can only function in the context of biblical revelation.
This counsel directs the child to God and not to his own resources.
(^) In the next chapter we will re-think these goals in light of the
chief end of man.
Application Questions for Chapter 5
(^) 1. How do you define success? How would your child complete
this sentence? “What Mom and Dad want for me is ... ”
(^) 2. You are pushed and pulled by the things that are listed under
unbiblical goals. Which of these unbiblical goals influences your
parenting the most adversely?
(^) 3. Remember, you are a shaping influence for your children.
What makes you tick? What would you say drives you day by day?
What do you fear, love, feel anxious about? What are the values
taught in your home?
(^) 4. Like Old Testament Israel, you are affected by the culture
around you. How has the culture impacted your view of children and
your goals for your children?
(^) 5. Are you in tune with the idea of living for the glory of God?
Does that thought pulsate for you, or is it a bland religious idea?
(^) 6. What are the subtle ways you are tempted to teach your
children to function in society on its terms?
(^) 7. What mixed signals do you send to your children?