some perspective and handle their emotions in a positive way.
Likewise, if they’re denying their emotions and retreating to the
left, as Amanda was doing, they’re hugging the bank of rigidity. In
that case, we need to help them bring in more of the right brain so
they can be open to new input and experiences.
So how do we promote horizontal integration in our child’s
brain? Here are two strategies you can use right away when
“integration opportunities” arise in your family. By using these
techniques, you’ll be taking immediate steps toward integrating the
left and right hemispheres of your child’s brain.
What You Can Do:
Helping Your Child Work from Both Sides of the Brain
Whole-Brain Strategy #1:
Connect and Redirect: Surfing Emotional Waves
One night Tina’s seven-year-old son reappeared in the living room
shortly after going to bed, explaining that he couldn’t sleep. He was
clearly upset and explained, “I’m mad that you never leave me a
note in the middle of the night!” Surprised at this unusual outburst,
Tina replied, “I didn’t know you wanted me to.” His response was
to unleash a whole litany of rapid-ɹre complaints: “You never do
anything nice for me, and I’m mad because my birthday isn’t for
ten more months, and I hate homework!”
Logical? No. Familiar? Yes. All parents experience times when
their children say things and get upset about issues that don’t seem
to make sense. An encounter like this can be frustrating, especially
when you expect your child to be old enough to act rationally and
hold a logical conversation. All of a sudden, though, he becomes
upset about something ridiculous, and it seems that absolutely no
amount of reasoning on your part will help.