Parenting With Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility

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couple of kids out of the car. I’ve always been afraid of doing this before
because the kids might get kidnapped or something, but I’d have the
confidence to do it if you were watching them and making sure they were
safe.”
Next morning, true to form, by the time Stacey’s car reached First and
Main, the kids were screaming like little monkeys in too small of a cage.
Stacey said, “Guys, I can’t drive with that noise. It hassles my mind.”
The kids hit the volume knob. They knew Mom wasn’t going to do
anything — she never had before — and they felt safe no matter how loud
they got.
Stacey gave them another chance to amend their ways. “Hey, guys!”
she yelled over the commotion. “I can’t drive with that noise.” It was to
no avail.
So right at Third and Main, Stacey pulled the car over, went around to
the other side of the car, and opened the kids’ door. “We can’t walk
home,” they said. “We’ll be kidnapped.”
But Stacey hung tough. This was, after all, what her rehearsal had been
for. She said, “Keep your eyes down. Don’t look up, and maybe nobody
will bother you. I’ll see you at home.” And she took off.
Later her friend told her, “You didn’t need me. You should have seen
those kids walking home. They looked so somber. They never did look
up.”
You can bet Stacey’s kids listen to her now. If we can pull one of these
tactics when there is no hurry to get anywhere, then when we are in a
hurry, one little word directed toward the backseat will get the results we
are after.
We would like to provide some additional clarification about this
Pearl, which involves risk that some parents will see as acceptable and
others will not. Society as a whole has become more protective. Children
must be in car seats until they are seven; because of child labor laws, a
school-age child can’t legally help his dad in the family business; no
child can be expelled easily from school for disrupting the studies of
other children. Society hasn’t made it easy for parents to take even small,

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