Parenting With Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility

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PEARL 11


Discipline 101


The key to effective discipline is to control only what we can control.


We can never make an infant stop crying, quit bothering us, stop sucking
his or her thumb, or cut the whining. What we can and should control,
though, is where he or she does all these things. If our children ignore our
firm “Please stop” once, with no pleading or whining on our part, then
they should be given the opportunity to act obnoxiously someplace else
— and that place is in their room. But remember, we are not sending
them there to punish them; we are merely giving them the opportunity to
pull themselves together. If they come out still angry and obnoxious, we
send them back to stay an added five minutes for every year of their age.
We should never forget to show love to our kids. When their good
mood returns, they need to be hugged and rocked for doing things right.
Also, keep in mind these three common mistakes that surface during
discipline sessions:


First,  we  can be  too tough.  Little  kids    are,    at  times,  no  fun.    Aren’t
we all? Remember, everyone has a right to be crabby and moody at
times — even our kids. For example, if we’ve kept our young child
up far past the normal bedtime and he or she is a total grump the
next day, is it fair for us to sentence the child to solitary
confinement? Understanding and common sense go a long way in
parent-child relationships.

Second, we  can be  too lenient,    putting up  with    too much    before  we
issue the “Go” command. Too much malarkey stretches our
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