PEARL 14

Eating and Table Manners

Rachel, a loving mom, has spent the better part of her afternoon stooped

over a hot stove. She’s whipping up a treat, a dish never before seen on
the family table: chicken cacciatore. Sweat mingled with seasonings,
labor with love.
All eyes were on the proud chef as she carried her covered creation to
the dinner table. She lifted the lid, savored the aromatic steam, and then
awaited the gasps of appreciation from her loving children. What does
Rachel hear instead? A chorus of “Oh, yuck! That stuff is gross!”
“Yuck” can spoil the dinner-table joy, and when dinner-table problems
arise — either in displeasure with the food or with tacky table manners
— the table becomes less an arena for love than a ground for battle. But
not to worry. Rachel’s a Love and Logic parent. She was disappointed,
yes, but she took the criticism in stride. “No problem,” she said as she
scooped up her kids’ plates and strode to the garbage disposal, where with
one flip of the wrist, the problem was resolved.
Then in a soft voice, she said, “Run along, kids. Do what kids do after
dinner. We’ll see you at breakfast.”
Later on that evening, the kids raided the refrigerator. Rachel watched
with curiosity, and when her kids had finished eating, she said, “You’ve
just eaten $5.95 worth of food. How do you want to pay me: cash or from
your allowance? The choice is yours.” The logic behind her words is that
she had already bought the food for the evening meal, and kids who
rejected that meal and made their own must pay for it.
As with so many things, problems with eating can be eliminated