responsible children usually come from families in which parents almost
never use the word responsibility. It’s a fact: Responsibility cannot be
taught; it must be caught.
To help our children gain responsibility, we must offer them
opportunities to be responsible. That’s the key. Parents who raise
responsible kids spend very little time and energy worrying about their
kids’ responsibilities; they worry more about how to let the children
encounter SLOs for their irresponsibility. They are involved with their
kids, certainly, lovingly using good judgment as to when their children
are ready to learn the next level of life’s lessons. But they don’t spend
their time reminding them or worrying for them. In a subtle way, they’re
saying, “I’m sure you’ll remember on your own, but if you don’t, you’ll
surely learn something from the experience.” These parents help their
children understand they can solve their own problems. These parents are
sympathetic but don’t solve their kids’ problems.
Children who grow in responsibility also grow in self-esteem, a
prerequisite for achievement in the real world. As their self-esteem and
self-confidence grow, children are better able to make it once the parental
ties are cut.
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(lu)
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