- Badgering: “Why? Why? Why? Why?”
Badgering is the “Please, please, please, please!” or “Why, why,
why?” routine. “Just this once! Just this once! Just this once! Just this
once!” “Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom!” Some children could have
been machine guns during the last war. The child keeps after you and
after you and after you, trying to wear you down with repetition. “Just
give me what I want and I’ll shut up!” is the underlying message.
Badgering can be particularly taxing when it is done loudly and in
public. Some parents attempt to respond to everything the frustrated
child says every time she says it. Mom or Dad may try to explain, to
reassure, or to distract the child. As badgering continues, parents can
become more and more desperate, going on the equivalent of a verbal
wild-goose chase—searching for the right words or reasons to make
the child keep quiet. However, many kids are extremely single-
minded once their badgering starts. They won’t stop until either they
get what they want or their parent uses a more effective approach to
stop the testing.
Badgering is what we refer to as a great “blender” tactic, since it
mixes easily with other manipulative strategies. The basic element in
badgering, of course, is repetition. So when any of the other verbal
testing tactics are repeated again and again, the resulting
manipulative strategy is a combination of that other tactic plus the
repetitive power of badgering. - Temper (Intimidation): “I HATE YOU!”
Displays of temper, or what we sometimes refer to as intimidation,
involve obvious, aggressive behavior. Younger children whose
language skills aren’t quite as developed may throw themselves on
the floor, bang their heads, holler at the top of their lungs, and kick
around ferociously. Older kids may come up with arguments that
accuse you of being unjust, illogical, or simply a bad parent in
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(Marcin)
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