What to Do: Don’t treat lying as if it were a great crime. If you
already know that a child did something wrong, don’t “corner” him by
asking questions when you already know the answers to see if he is
going to tell the truth. Gently punish your child for lying if necessary.
Most important, if a child regularly lies about a problem behavior (for
example, not completing homework), fix the basic problem and the
child will no longer feel compelled to lie about it.
- Cleaning room and picking up
Erroneous Expectation: Parents expect their children to be able to
immediately follow through with the instruction “clean your room” or
“pick up your stuff.”
The Reality: All children like making a mess, but few children of any
age like picking up. Typically developing preschoolers cannot clean
their rooms without supervision and praise. By grades two to three,
children can straighten their room (with specific instructions given),
as well as run errands or complete simple chores. By age six, children
can complete chores up to twenty minutes in length and clean their
room after a request.
What to Do: For children under the age of four, model appropriate
chore completion by doing the task alongside your child at first.
Provide a visual list of what you’d like done (like a 1-2-3 Magic chart
or a series of simple pictures) and praise the child’s
accomplishments. For older children, consider the weekly cleanup
routine, the garbage bag method, or the docking system.
- Dinnertime: Sitting and eating
Erroneous Expectation: Parents expect their children of all ages to