Learning Curves 137bilities unless we’re doing Plan B. Have a Proactive Plan B
discussion with him this week and see if he has any ideas
about how you guys could solve that problem before it comes
up again—once and for all?”DEFINE THE PROBLEMYou might think that this step wouldn’t often go missing
since adults usually know what their concerns are. The
reality is that adults often don’t know what their con-
cerns are—they know what their solutions are. It’s actu-
ally quite common that adults have never really given
much consideration at all to what their concerns are.A ten-year-old boy went to summer camp for two months.
The family therapist anticipated that the boy and his par-
ents would be happier than usual when they came in for
their first session after he came home from camp (since they
hadn’t seen one another for two months). But what walked
into the office were three livid people.
“What’s up?” the therapist asked no one in particular
once the three were seated in the office.
“They won’t give me my money,” the boy seethed.
“What money?” asked the therapist.
The boy growled, “They put two months of allowance