The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically I

(sharon) #1
164 The Explosive Child

in the car, we’re in a hurry, and I don’t feel like
going through this with you right now! Go get me
my keys and let’s go!
Charlotte (slamming and locking the front door to
the house): Stay away from me! I’m not going!
Mother (still using Plan A): Charlotte, you unlock this
door right now! (Turning to husband in car):
Honey, do you have your keys?
Husband: No. Why?
Mother (pulse pounding, turning back to the locked
front door, still using Plan A): Charlotte, open the
door, dammit! This isn’t funny!
[No response from inside the house.]
Father (arriving at front door): What’s going on?
Mother (through gritted teeth): Your daughter has
informed me that she’s not going to the beach
and has locked us out of our house.

Hmmm. That actually looks like an example of how
not to do it. Now, through the magic of book writing,
let’s do something that you don’t have the luxury of
doing in real life: rewind the tape and try a different
approach.


Charlotte: I’m not going.
Mother (Empathy, with a question mark): You’re not
going?
Charlotte: No, I’m not going!
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