The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically I

226 The Explosive Child

know what’s going on in someone’s head. It just gets

you guys more agitated with one another.”

“No more speculation?” said the mother.

“Not if you guys want to actually start talking to

one another,” the therapist confirmed.

“What should we do if someone does one of those

three things?” Mitchell asked.

“Just point it out to them without being judgmen-

tal,” the therapist said. “If someone is sarcastic, just say,

‘That’s sarcasm.’ If someone is one-upping, say, ‘That’s

one-upmanship.’ And if someone is speculating, say...”

“ ‘That’s speculation,’ ” said Mitchell.

“My, we catch on fast,” said the father.

“That’s sarcasm,” said Mitchell.

Does the CPS model ever fail to work? What then?

There’s good reason to be optimistic that, with your
help, your explosive child will be able to respond to frustra-
tion more adaptively. These are resilient kids—they do re-
spond to being understood and to good treatment.
Most of the time. There are, unfortunately, children who
do not have access to, refuse to participate in, or do not re-
spond as favorably to treatment and who continue to be-
have in an unsafe manner at home, at school, and/or in the
community. Many started a downward spiral early, became
increasingly alienated, began exhibiting more serious forms