Oh Crap! Potty Training

Obviously, don’t let your child handle the actual poop. But have him
go get clean clothes and change himself. Take your time about it.
The idea is that it should start to register that it takes a lot more time
out of play to clean up than to just sit and do it on the potty. You
don’t want to let your child dump the poop and flush it down. That’s
the part of the process that is usually fun, and so he doesn’t get to do
that unless he sat for the whole deal.
The next thing you might need to do is provide a small,
immediate consequence. Some parents balk at this. You do not want
to give consequences in the first couple of days, when your child is
still learning. But after you are pretty certain she knows the ropes, at
least in theory, it’s okay to give a small consequence. As I said, it
should be small and immediate. Usually taking away whatever she is
playing with at the time, or taking her out of that activity, does the
trick. Time-outs are usually ineffective, as are longer-term, more
distant consequences, like taking away dessert after dinner. Little
kids don’t have the thought process to connect such separate events.
The reason you want to give a consequence is that, once he knows
the drill and is still pooping in his pants or on the floor, you’re
dealing with a behavior issue. Whether it’s intentional rebelliousness
or just being “lazy,” it’s still behavior. The consequence shouldn’t be
mean or draconian, but should simply reinforce cause-and-effect in a
way that actually affects him. When pooping in his pants isn’t
enough of an effect (and for some children, it isn’t) we need to add
another component. You can also refer to chapter 13, “Behavior vs.
Potty Training,” for more on this.
When I met former client Rachel, her son was pretty well potty