Give and Take: WHY HELPING OTHERS DRIVES OUR SUCCESS

the radar. In 2011, Love left the White House to study at Wharton. He sent a note to Skender: “I’m on
the train to Philly to start the executive MBA program and one of the first classes is financial
accounting—and I just wanted to say thanks for sticking with me when I was in your class.”
A dozen years earlier, after Beth Traynham took the CPA exam, she approached Skender to warn
him about her disappointing performance. She told him she was sure she flunked the entire exam, but
Skender knew better. He promised: “If you didn’t pass, I’ll pay your mortgage.” Skender was right
again—and he wasn’t just right about Beth. That spring, the silver and bronze medalists on the CPA
exam in North Carolina were also his students. Skender’s students earned the top three scores of all
3,396 CPA candidates who took the exam. It was the first time in North Carolina that any school had
swept the medals, and although accounting was a male-dominated field, all three of Skender’s
medalists were women. In total, Skender has had more than forty different students win CPA medals
by placing in the top three in the state. He has also demonstrated a knack for identifying future
teachers: more than three dozen students have followed in his footsteps into university teaching. How
does he know talent when he sees it?
It may sound like pure intuition, but C. J. Skender’s skill in recognizing potential has rigorous
science behind it. Spotting and cultivating talent are essential skills in just about every industry; it’s
difficult to overstate the value of surrounding ourselves with stars. As with networking and
collaboration, when it comes to discovering the potential in others, reciprocity styles shape our
approaches and effectiveness. In this chapter, I want to show you how givers succeed by recognizing
potential in others. Along with tracing Skender’s techniques, we’ll take a look at how talent scouts
identify world-class athletes, why people end up overinvesting in low-potential candidates, and what
top musicians say about their first teachers. But the best place to start is the military, where
psychologists have spent three decades investigating what it takes to identify the most talented cadets.