The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook for Anxiety

222 The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook

6. Assertiveness problems?

Judgments instead of facts (see page 206)

“You” statements instead of “I” statements (see page 206)

No specific behavioral description of what you want (see page 207)

7. Blocks to listening? (see page 212)

Mind reading

Rehearsing

Filtering

Judging

Daydreaming

Advising

Sparring

Being right

Derailing

Placating

8. Forgot the conflict management strategies?

Mutual validation (see page 215)

Broken record (see page 216)

Probing (see page 217)

Clouding (see page 217)

Assertive delay (see page 218)

9. Negotiation breakdown?

Did you forget to use RAVEN?

 Relax

 Avoid the aversive

 Validate the other person’s need or concern

 Examine your values

 Neutral voice

Didn’t use compromise solutions?

The Communication Effectiveness Checklist is a starting point to evaluate interactions that
you wish could have gone better. Identify the problems first, then decide which ones you want to