“AAAAAAAAHHHHH!” cried Gabie, romantically. She repeated this
several times while I gave her the flowers and sang ‘Happy Birthday’ a
few times over. Then I got down on one knee, and produced the ring.
“AAAAAAAAHHHHH!” cried Gabie again, which I had come to realise
was her way of saying: ‘woohoo! My handsome and wonderful
boyfriend is proposing to me! What larks!’
Eventually, Gabie managed an actual word, which was the one I
was hoping for.
She said yes.
As we walked off together into the sunset, the planets rearranged
themselves into a heart shape and the birds flew west for the spring. A
gentle breeze played through the springtime apple blossom, just as it
had when my parents met in Chapter 1. Remember that? Man, that
was a good chapter.
Preparation for the wedding started immediately and, let me tell you,
whoever said planning a wedding is easy was lying. Actually I’ve never
heard anyone say that, but if anyone ever does, they’re lying. There
was so much to think about; we had to select a date that everyone
could make, we had to think about the venue, the priest who was
going to preside over the ceremony, what animal to have pulling the
carriage, the food, the flowers, the dress, the decorations, the vol-
auvents, the cheese and pineapple on sticks, and so many other
things. Accommodating everyone’s lifelong fears took days, what a
faff. It was hectic, but gradually things started to settle down. We
decided on a date a few months away: the 11th of February 2016,
1060 years to the day since Tiberius Claudius Caesar Britannicus, heir
to the Roman Emperorship, died under mysterious circumstances in
Rome, and true love sure is mysterious too. As the best man ever,
obviously Ollie would be my best man. We asked Ollie’s brother-in-
law, @RevChris7, to preside over the joyous occasion, because he
was already a priest, which would save some time.