and tutors, even if we cannot really grasp much value in what they are
trying to impart to us. At least some of what they say will later declare
itself to be of importance in life, and we will be glad we did not reject
it out of hand. This is gentle guidance of childhood's energies and not
a brutal bridling and suppression of them. Later on, in our own mod
ified forms, we will find ourselves passing on these traditions ourselves,
and the important thing is that as adults we should try to embody and
exemplify them.
There is also the question of energy. Children have so much. It is
a torrent that can break its banks and dissipate itself in self-destructive
ways. What the better type of adult and tutor is trying to do is build
up the bank of dharma, of sensible, responsible duty so that the tor
rent of our youthful exuberance should not lose itself in the desert
sands.
That is why parents try to restrain sexual precocity, or prevent our
staying out too late with other young acquaintances who may embody
our worst tendencies rather than our better aspirations. That is why
our elders try to rein in the precocious desire to sample the excesses of
the world. It is a premature waste of energy. Children have brilliant
minds; they can learn computing and math, Latin and Sanskrit as no
adult can. If all adolescence is cast away on girl or boy friends for
whom one feels attraction but no depth of love, one is wasting one's
natural talents. Continence in every sense is not repression. It is di
rected channeling for a more mature and glorious flow that will come
in its good time.
The second stage of life is designated as grhasthasrama, and it is
the time for earning one's living and sampling the pleasures of the
world. Grh means house, and so you are a householder with your own
roof, a certain liberty, and a spouse to lie beside you at night. The hor
rors of creeping off to school with a satchel full of books and perhaps
homework undone are replaced by the joys of family life. These involve
getting up in the night when your babies cry and a bleary-eyed drive to
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