I took my phone back from Aditi didi’s bag when I got to my room.
I checked the time. 2 a.m. I hadn’t unlocked my phone to read my messages yet. Message
notifications flooded my phone home screen. They read like this:
Debu: Hey baby, what’s up?
Debu: Is there anything I can do to help? Can I talk to anyone on your side?
Debu: 5 more messages
Neel: In my room. Here if you need me.
Neel: When can we talk?
Neel: You around? Can we meet? Like for a minute?
Neel: 3 more messages
Brijesh: Hope you are fine? Get some rest, okay?
Brijesh: It’s all going to be okay. Stay calm.
How am I supposed to stay calm? A dozen messages from three different men, every hour.
And I have a wedding tomorrow. Mine. I have no clue with whom. How am I supposed to stay calm?
Aditi didi slept next to me. She woke up for water and noticed the lit phone screen in my hand.
‘Sleep, you idiot. You will have dark circles in all your wedding pictures.’
Yeah, that should be my biggest concern. Would the make-up lady apply enough concealer to
hide my dark circles? Why can’t I be like other girls? Why am I not thinking about how my lehenga
looked on me tonight? Why am I not worried about my nails? Why am I thinking about my dark life
rather than my dark circles?
Ting. Another message.
‘Put it on silent,’ Aditi didi groaned in a sleepy voice, ‘and come to bed.’
I looked at my phone screen.
Suraj: Hope you liked decorations, madam. Your dance was too good.
I shut the phone. I closed my eyes. But I couldn’t sleep.
What do I do? Who is it going to be? Debu, Neel or Brijesh? Oh, Radhika the great
distressed analyst, how do you analyse your way out of this distressed situation?
Some people are good at taking decisions. I am not one of them. Some people fall asleep quickly at
night. I am not one of them either. It is 3 in the morning. I have tossed and turned in bed for two hours.
I am to get married in fifteen hours. We have over 200 guests in the hotel, here to attend my grand
destination wedding. Everyone is excited. It is the first destination wedding in the Mehta family.
I am the bride. I should get my beauty sleep. I can’t. The last thing I care about right now is
beauty. The only thing I care about is how to get out of this mess. Because, like it often happens to me
in life, here I am yet again in a situation where I don’t know what the fuck is going on.
I lay still in bed for another half an hour. I thought about what I could do. I noticed Aditi didi
in deep sleep. I stared at the flickering red light of the smoke alarm on the ceiling. At 3.30 a.m., I
stepped out of bed. I opened the room curtains. The sea appeared pitch black. The light from a few
distant ships flickered in the background. Moonlight filled my eyes.