Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win

“They must have respected that,” the VP acknowledged.
“Exactly. They see Extreme Ownership in their leaders, and, as a
result, they emulate Extreme Ownership throughout the chain of
command down to the most junior personnel. As a group they try to
figure out how to fix their problems—instead of trying to figure out who
or what to blame. For those on the outside looking in, like our training
group—or the board in your case—the difference is obvious.”
“And that is how I appear to the board right now—blaming everyone
and everything else,” the VP recognized.
“There is only one way to fix it,” I told him.
For the next several days, I helped the VP prepare for the board
meeting. At times, he slipped back into defensiveness, not wanting to
accept blame. He felt in many ways that his knowledge exceeded that of
many members of the board—and he was probably right. But that didn’t
change the fact that he was the leader of a team that was failing its
mission. As we rehearsed the VP’s portion of the board presentation, I
was unconvinced that he truly accepted total responsibility for his team’s
failures. I told him that bluntly.
“I’m saying exactly what you told me to say,” the VP retorted. “The
reason that this mission was unsuccessful was my failure as a leader to
force execution.”
“That’s the problem,” I said. “You are saying it, but I’m not
convinced you believe it. Look at your career. You have accomplished
amazing things. But you certainly aren’t perfect. None of us are perfect.
You are still learning and growing. We all are. And this is a lesson for
you: if you reengage on this task, if you do a stern self-assessment of
how you lead and what you can do better, the outcome will be different.
But it starts here. It starts at the board meeting when you go in, put your