209These people breeze into meetings fifteen minutes late and
breathlessly apologize, talking about traffic, overwhelming job
responsibilities, or kid emergencies.
People whose time is out of control inconvenience others
whether they mean to or not. The problem often stems from
one or more of the following causes:
- Omnipotence. These people have unrealistic, somewhat
grandiose expectations of what they can accomplish in a given
amount of time. “No problem—I’ll do it” is their motto. - Overresponsibility for the feelings of others. They think that
leaving a party too early will cause the host to feel abandoned. - Lack of realistic anxiety. They live so much in the present
that they neglect to plan ahead for traffic, parking the car, or
dressing for an outing. - Rationalization. They minimize the distress and inconve-
nience that others must put up with because of their lateness.
They think, “They’re my friends—they’ll understand.”
The person with undeveloped time self-boundaries ends up
frustrating not only others, but himself. He ends the day with-
out the sense that a “desire realized is sweet to the soul” (Prov.
13:19 NASB). Instead, he is left with unrealized desires, half-
baked projects, and the realization that tomorrow will begin with
him running behind schedule.
Task Completion
A first cousin to the time boundary problem, task comple-
tion deals with “finishing well.” Most of us have goals in the love
and work areas of life. We may wish to be a veterinarian or a
lawyer. We may wish to own our own business or own a home
in the country. We may wish to start a Bible study program or
an exercise regimen.
We all would like to say about our tasks, whether large or small,
what Paul said: “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the
race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown
of righteousness” (2 Tim. 4:7–8). More eloquent in their simplicity
are Jesus’ words on the cross: “It is finished” (John 19:30).
Boundaries and Your Self