off the layers of who I had become and started finding out who I truly was,
I realized I didn’t need any of those things. I didn’t need a single object or
situation to be happy. Happiness came from me, from my view of the
world, not from external factors beyond my control. I stopped worrying so
much about what everybody would think of me, and I started focusing
more on what I was feeling inside. I knew that if I kept meditating, if I
kept enjoying life, life would take me to the places I needed to be. I
believed in this very simple philosophy so much that nothing seemed to
bother me. If I trusted that things would work out in my favor, they always
did.
For instance, after a year and a half of living in Costa Rica I started
waitressing at a restaurant owned by a very unpleasant woman. I was now
single, living on my own in a small shack on the beach, working with no
goal in sight other than continuing to be very, very happy. e owner of
the restaurant didn’t like me from the second we met. She would make
mean remarks, force me to work extra hours with no pay, and wouldn’t let
the chefs make me vegan food to eat (so I would work twelve-hour shifts
with little or no food). I didn’t mind. I knew her problems had absolutely
nothing to do with me, but were merely a reflection of her own issues. So I
continued working, making good friends with the rest of the staff, and
enjoying the connections I formed with people traveling through town.
e happier I was, the angrier she would get, and after I had worked at
her restaurant for months, she kicked me out one day for showing up in a
dark blue skirt instead of a black one (this was a low-key restaurant in a
surfer town, and my only black skirt was in the wash). She yelled and
cursed at me in front of the staff and told me to leave, as I was
“embarrassing” the restaurant with my clothing. A little over the top, if
you ask me! But I didn’t get upset. In that moment I realized that there is a
difference between going with the flow of life and seeing the good in
everything that comes your way and letting people walk all over you. One
of the mantras that I live by these days is: Do no harm—but take no shit!
e next morning I sat down on the beach at sunrise, meditated for a
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