here for you?”—will get you there.
Symptoms of Coaching the Ghost
They’re talking on and on about another person (complaining
about the boss, going on about a customer interaction, worrying
about someone on the team) or perhaps a project or a situation
(complaining about the new processes, going on about the project
creep, worrying about the impact of the business unit
reorganization).
Solution to Coaching the Ghost
Bring the focus back to the person you’re talking to. Acknowledge
what’s going on, and ask the Focus Question. It will sound
something like this:
“I think I understand some of what’s going on with [insert
name of the person or the situation]. What’s the real challenge
here for you?”
Abstractions & Generalizations
You plunge in. “So what’s on your mind?”
“I’m glad you asked. I don’t know if you read the latest HBR
blog post on this, but there’s some interesting thoughts about the
battle between strategy and culture. And I know this is something
we’re looking at as part of the project, and that the senior team is
considering...”
You nod, sure she’ll get to the point soon.