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Imaginethatmenarefrom MarsandwomenarefromVenus. Oneday longagotheMartians, looking
throughtheirtelescopes,discoveredtheVenusians.JustglimpsingtheVenusiansawakenedfeelingsthey
hadneverknown.TheyfellinloveandquicklyinventedspacetravelandflewtoVenus.

The VenusianswelcomedtheMartianswithopenarms. They had intuitivelyknownthatthisday would
come.Theirheartsopenedwidetoalovetheyhadneverfeltbefore.

ThelovebetweentheVenusiansandMartianswasmagical.Theydelightedinbeingtogether,doingthings
together,andsharingtogether.Thoughfromdifferentworlds,theyreveledin(tookpleasure)theirdifferences.
Theyspentmonthslearningabouteachother,exploringandappreciatingtheirdifferentneeds,preferences,
andbehaviorpatterns.Foryearstheylivedtogetherinloveandharmony.

ThentheydecidedtoflytoEarth.Inthebeginningeverythingwaswonderfulandbeautiful.Buttheeffects
ofEarth'satmospheretook hold, andonemorningeveryonewokeupwithapeculiarkind ofamnesia-,
selectiveamnesia!

BoththeMartiansandVenusiansforgotthattheywerefromdifferentplanetsandweresupposedtobe
different. In one morning everything they had learned about their differences was erased from their
memory.Andsincethatdaymenandwomenhavebeeninconflict.

REMEMBERINGOURDIFFERENCES................................................................................................

Withouttheawarenessthatwearesupposedtobedifferent,menandwomenareatoddswitheachother.
Weusually becomeangryorfrustratedwiththeoppositesexbecausewehaveforgottenthisimportant
truth.Weexpecttheoppositesextobemorelikeourselves.Wedesirethemto"wantwhatwewant"and
"feelthewaywefeel."

Wemistakenlyassumethatifourpartnersloveustheywillreactandbehaveincertainways_theways
wereactandbehavewhenwelovesomeone.Thisattitudesetsusuptobedisappointedagainandagain
anditpreventsusfromtakingthenecessarytimetocommunicatelovinglyaboutourdifferences.

Men mistakenly expectwomentothink, communicate, andreacttheway men do; womenmistakenly
expectmen to feel, communicate, andrespondtheway womendo. Wehaveforgotten thatmen and
women aresupposed to bedifferent. Asa result, ourrelationships arefilledwith unnecessary friction
(abrasion;discord)andconflict.

Clearlyrecognizingandrespectingthesedifferencesdramaticallyreduceconfusionwhendealingwiththe