126 PowerPhrases in Action
The speakers will not appreciate any attempts to sneak your own
agenda in or your long-winded comments that derail them from
saying what they need to.
PowerPhrases for Listening Are Specific
“You’re not listening to me!” William exclaimed.
Yes I am!his boss, Sue, defended. Maybe she was. If she was, it wasn’t
helping. William wasn’t feeling heard. When Sue changed what
she said to
What I hear you saying is...William calmed.
You need to choose words that assure your listeners that
they have been heard. Those words must be carefully selected
to specifically reflect what they are saying to you. When
William’s boss told him what she heard him say, he felt heard.
When Sheila heard us repeat back what she said at the meeting,
she felt heard. Your responses will not be the same for everyone
in every situation. Your responses need to be specific to reflect
what they are telling you.
PowerPhrases for Listening Are
Targeted
Consciously choose goals before you begin to listen. Effective
listening goals are to (A) make them feel safe, (B) draw them