Poison Phrases 31
through some lovely scenes while he studied his Pokemon cards.
I said,
You should look up!He said, “I’ll look anywhere I want to!” I set myself up for that
response by “shoulding” on him.
Be very careful of words like
Should
If I were you
What you need to do is
You’re supposed to
You ought to
You must
People hear these words as a challenge to their judgment
and as a denial of their free will. Don’t tell them what to do. I
could have told my young friend,
There is a great view right now you’ll like.Then he could have decided what he “should” do about it.
- Do you ever sneak in Vicious Venom Poison Phrases that
maim with Veiled Assumptions? Phrases that express your
assumptions as facts and that draw conclusions from them are
Poison Phrases. Avoid saying,
Because you didn’t care enough to call, I made the decision
myself.