relationship. Over the years his daughter Amber and her husband had taken in
family members who had fallen on hard times. They also volunteered every
weekend in their community and had completed several service trips.
Don told them that he admired them. He admired how they lived their lives and
the example that their lives provided the world. He added that he was so proud of
the young woman Amber had become. And then he told me this: “Right before I
was about to say it. I was so afraid. Imagine that. I was afraid to say something
because I was afraid to get emotional.”
He said that after that conversation, his relationship with his daughter was never
the same again. They are now closer than he ever imagined and the experience
inspired him to live by this rule: Leave nothing important unsaid.
Intimacy takes courage. Risking getting emotional or upsetting someone so that
you can express yourself is scary, but the result is magical. I experienced that same
magic in a simple conversation with my father last fall. I was on my way to the
airport having just finished a speaking engagement in Miami and I saw a text from
my dad: “Call me as soon as you can.”
That’s odd, I thought to myself. I called the house, and my mom picked up the
phone.
“Hi Mom, I just got a text from Dad asking me to call. Is everything okay?”
“You should talk to him, let me get him for you...”
She set the phone down, as I tried to catch her
“Wait, Mom! What’s going on?”
I could hear the kitchen door creak as she opened it and yelled for my dad,
“BOB! Mel’s on the phone!”
I had no idea what was going on. At first, I thought that I was in trouble. I sat
in the back of that cab feeling like a 10-year-old who was about to get grounded.