82 How to Sell Yourself
and acronyms. Look at a section of the Federal Register (the pub-
lication that transcribes the speeches delivered on the floor of
Congress) and you’ll get a lesson in how not to write a speech.
“It is incumbent upon us to ensure that the obfuscatory na-
ture of formal discourse be dispensed with in the most propitious
manner.” This quote really says, “Simplify your language.” It’s
amazing how many of us make the mistake of trying to impress an
audience with our brilliance while forgetting to express ourselves
clearly, simply, briefly, and unforgettably.
How about this one:
“Serving as a panelist with the other past presidents of
the (association name) is indeed a pleasure and a rare
opportunity. It is hard to believe that a 10-year span of time
has passed since our first session. What perspectives the
various past presidents have brought to the hundreds of
people who have attended our sessions through the years!”
I’m sure that those words felt perfectly natural to the person
writing them as he was putting them on paper, but they certainly
don’t “talk like conversation.” If you don’t edit the garbage of “a 10-
year span of time” to “10 years,” you’ll trip over your words at the
lectern, and worse, you’ll run the risk of sounding like a windbag. And
remember: Nobody loves a windbag—not even another windbag.
Do yourself and your audience a favor. Convert flowery lan-
guage into simple, everyday conversation:
“I can’t believe it’s been 10 years since our first ses-
sion! It’s great to serve here with the other past presidents.
Each has brought a unique perspective.”Short sentences are winners
On the podium, long sentences will get you in trouble. They’ll
force you to look at your text and read when you should be look-
ing at your audience and talking.
I’ve seen speech texts with sentences of 60 words and up.
Let’s look at one with a mere 28:
“Those costs and the inconvenience to airline pas-
sengers can be reduced substantially, but fundamental
changes in the funding and management of our air traffic
control system are required.”