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Chapter 2

The Duel

I

SPENT a long time, almost eight years, in the military

cadet school at Petersburg, and in the novelty of my sur-

roundings there, many of my childish impressions grew

dimmer, though I forgot nothing. I picked up so many new

habits and opinions that I was transformed into a cruel, ab-

surd, almost savage creature. A surface polish of courtesy

and society manners I did acquire together with the French

language.

But we all, myself included, looked upon the soldiers in

our service as cattle. I was perhaps worse than the rest in

that respect, for I was so much more impressionable than

my companions. By the time we left the school as officers,

we were ready to lay down our lives for the honour of the

regiment, but no one of us had any knowledge of the real

meaning of honour, and if anyone had known it, he would

have been the first to ridicule it. Drunkenness, debauch-

ery and devilry were what we almost prided ourselves on. I

don’t say that we were bad by nature, all these young men

were good fellows, but they behaved badly, and I worst of

all. What made it worse for me was that I had come into my