THE CHALLENGE OF STAGE FIVE
The greatest challenge in stage five is not to rush into taking
on the responsibilities of marriage. Many marriages fail not
because couples picked the wrong partner but because they
did not prepare adequately. When the inevitable stresses and
problems of moving in and sharing a home and life together
arise, they begin to doubt that they are with the right person.
They lose touch with the very special feelings of love and
commitment they felt in stage five.
The engagement stage is an opportunity for the couple to
create lasting memories of their special love for each other. It
is a time to practice the most basic skills of loving before put-
ting them to the test of marriage. Being engaged is like a warm-
up period before more rigorous exercise. It is a time to stretch
your relationship muscles so that when you put them to the
test and exercise them, they will be ready. An engagement
prepares you to succeed in marriage.
Being engaged is like a warm-up period
before more rigorous exercise.When couples take at least five to eight months to bask in
the certainty of their love, then they are ready when the big
tests come later. As the stress of marriage increases, we are
able to once again find that love in our heart because we have
had many pure and untainted experiences of love for our
partner and his or her love for us. Being engaged provides a
strong and necessary foundation for taking on the challenges
of moving in and sharing the complexities of life with a partner.
STAGE FIVE: ENGAGEMENT / 111