ability to give and receive in a relationship. When a woman
has a conversation her objective is to share. A man makes the
best impression by asking questions and listening. Sharing in
her thoughts and feelings is the way to win a woman over.
A confident and competent man is very
attractive to a woman, but what makes her
more interested in him is his ability to ask
questions and listen.On Venus, the way to demonstrate consideration and caring
for another person is to ask lots of questions and be careful not
to dominate the conversation. When two women get together
to talk, one starts out by asking questions and listening with
interest. After some time they switch roles. This is the unspoken
guideline for sharing on Venus.
Even if one of the women talks for a long time, the other
woman does not mind because she instinctively knows that
her friend will give her the chance to talk. Her time will come.
This switching of roles occurs when the person talking stops
talking and starts asking questions. Then the listener gets a
chance to talk. This, however, works only because both
Venusians understand the ritual.
With a Martian it doesn’t automatically work. She asks
questions and he answers. But he doesn’t know that after she
asks him questions he is supposed to ask her questions. When
she seems really interested in him, he doesn’t realize that this
is a signal that he is supposed to show he is really interested
in her by asking questions.
When a woman asks a lot of questions,
that is a secret Venusian signal that he should
stop talking and ask her questions.220 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.