THREE STYLES OF LEARNING
Finding a partner is like any other skill in life; it takes talent,
education, and practice. The more information, education, and
experience you have, the better you will be. Through gaining
all three, your chances of mastering a skill are the highest.
Shakespeare alluded to these three styles of learning when he
said, “Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some
have greatness thrust upon them.” Another way of putting it
is that there are runners, walkers, and jumpers. Let’s explore
these styles in greater detail.
Style One: RunnersSome people are just gifted. They are born with an enormous
talent. For example, they can sit down at a piano and practically
start playing right away. They can just hear a song and then
play it. They don’t need to read music. These gifted students
or prodigies are the runners. They quickly find success and
achievement in a particular endeavor. In relationships, runners
are those few who just meet someone, fall in love, and live
happily ever after. They are the minority. Most of us are not
runners.
Style Two: WalkersMost people are walkers. They learn from a teacher and
through trial and error. These people do not have greatness
given to them. Instead they earn it, they attain it, they seek it
out and find it, they do something to make it happen. These
people discover their talent through education and a series of
life experiences. In learning to play the piano, for example,
they gradually learn to play with the expert guidance of a
teacher and by learning to read music.
356 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.