Chapter 59
The Loss of a Spouse
The Loss of a Spouse through Death
The death of a spouse has been assessed to be the highest level of trauma. It is followed in
second place by divorce. The sorrow that grips you on the loss of a spouse can drive you to your
own death if you do not come out of that sorrowful state quickly.^1
8 Stages
- Shock––The unexpected has happened. I never dreamt this would
happen to me. I am helpless. - Denial––This is not really happening to me. I am sure it is simply a
bad dream that will soon pass. - Fear––What will become of me? Is my life over? How will I cope?
- Guilt––It is my fault. Maybe there was something I could have done
to prevent this from happening. - Hurt/pain––I ache, my heart bleeds.
- Anger––Why me? Why did I have to lose my husband? How could
God have allowed this to happen to me? - Acceptance––So be it. What has happened has happened. I will face it.