Model Marriage
The ideal thing in marriage is for the husband, as head, to take the lead in spiritual matters. However, in the
instances above, it might appear that the wife is rather the one ahead spiritually.
If you as a wife, try to give him a lecture on how important it is to pray or not to backslide, you may not achieve
much. What is sure to work is your prayer for him. Find a good time and be praying while he is around. Try inviting
him without being too forceful. Gradually, with prayer and wisdom, I believe you will be able to get him to do what
he should do.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that if any obey not the word, they
may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
1 Peter 3:1
(Refer to Chapter 8 pg. 28-30, “Love in Marriage––Agape”; Refer to Chapter 25 pg. 105-109, “The Key of
Acceptance”).
Q. He likes to move with unbeliever friends and sees nothing wrong with being with them.
A. This may be a sign that your husband is backsliding but you must walk in love towards him. “Love never
fails”. The duty of a backsliding husband’s wife is first to pray for him. Second, find subtle ways of making him stay
at home, or to desire to be at home more than with his friends. As a last resort, create an atmosphere and talk to him.
The thrust of whatever you speak to him about must be the salvation of his soul, and not too much about the safety
of your marriage. Once he is restored, his attitude to the marriage and to staying at home will also most likely be
affected positively.
(Refer to Chapter 8 pg. 28-30, “Love in Marriage––Agape”).
Q. She seems not to attach much seriousness to serving in church.
A. The truth is that you cannot force your wife to like serving in church. One of the things that may account
for this attitude may be that she does not get much help from you with the handling of the household chores.
Furthermore, she may not see the difference in your life even though you are so involved in church work. If
however, this is not the case, then there is a genuine cause for concern.
As the head, there must be a way to get your household to follow you in serving God. Have a chat with your wife
and know what her real difficulties are and assist her, with patience and love, to surmount them. You must however,
bear in mind that it is not everybody who will be zealous in serving in the church. It depends on the degree of
conviction, growth, and commitment of the person. Aim at getting your wife to become more mature as a Christian,
while you show her a good example as a Christian husband.
(Refer to Chapter 8 pg. 28-30, “Love in Marriage––Agape”; Refer to Chapter 25 pg. 105-109, “The Key of
Acceptance”).
Q. I want to be able to pray with my family regularly. He does not pray with me.
A. It is ideal to have both husband and wife praying together with the whole family. The reality is that it may
not happen that way. I would first suggest that the wife should be grateful that she has a husband, who, at least prays.
It is important that a couple prays together sometimes. This helps the bonding of the two, and the Bible states that
if two agree as touching anything in prayer it has greater effect. It is therefore in the interest of the couple to find
time to pray together sometimes.
As the head of the home, it is the responsibility of the husband to be the priest of the home. As a priest, therefore,
his duty is to bring his family together occasionally for fellowship. Be like Abraham and command your household
after you. You may have separate prayer times and join up on certain issues.
For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall
keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment; that the Lord may bring upon Abraham
that which he hath spoken of him.
Genesis 18:19