The Step Home
- Recognize that the son or daughter is closely related to your spouse and that he/she
loves him/her. Consider Abraham’s mood when he had to send Hagar and Ishmael
away.
And Sarah saw the son of Hagar the Egyptian, which she had born unto
Abraham, mocking. Wherefore she said unto Abraham, Cast out this
bondwoman and her son: for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with
my son, even with Isaac. And the thing was very grievous in Abraham's sight
because of his son.
Genesis 21:9-11
- Decide on the involvement of the child’s other parent before you marry. Minimum
interference in your new home is advised. Frequent interaction between the child’s
parents is not necessary. If possible, get a neutral person to act as a liaison to avoid
questions and mistrust.
- Always endeavour to be a united couple in the eyes of the child.
- Know the reality of a bitter stepchild.^1
And Sarah saw the son of Hagar the Egyptian, which she had born unto
Abraham, mocking.
Genesis 21:9
- Believe God to fight certain battles for you.
- Seek counsel when necessary.
- Do not encourage or fan any rift between your spouse and the stepchild.^2
- Do not be seen to form a clique with your spouse’s stepchild.
- Accept the fact that children are not perfect creatures. Your own children may also be
stubborn or full of mistakes. A stepchild needs working on too. Handle him/her with
love. Do not always take your spouse’s correction of the stepchild as hatred. Allow
your spouse to train the stepchild in accordance with biblical principles.^3
Notes
- F. Philip Rice, Intimate Relationships, Marriages and Families (Mountain View,
California: Mayfield Publishing Company, 1999), 551, 561 - 72.
- Robert Barnes, Single Parenting(Wheaton, Illinois: Tyndale House Publishers, 1992),
263 - 4.
- Ibid., 264 - 6.
