Personal distance between speakers is close in the Middle East, so backing
away can be interpreted as an insult. Be prepared for more touching and
physical contact in conversations. In fact, for Arab men holding hands is
quite common – the gesture is a sign of friendship and respect.
Traditionally, a veiled Saudi woman in the company of a Saudi man isn’t
introduced.
Shortly after Charlotte, her husband, and their two young children moved to
Saudi Arabia, they visited the Red Sea for a bit swimming and sightseeing. When
they arrived, Charlotte noticed that the men were chatting, embracing, swim-
ming, and seemed to be having a grand time. The women, covered from head to
foot in dark, heavy, traditional dress, clustered in the background, looking after
the children when needed. The men were such a close, personal group that the
women and children seemed extraneous to their needs. With her western frame
of mind, Charlotte resented the men ‘having all the fun’. She later found out
from a Saudi friend that many women have their own very close and intimate
friendships at home and out of the public eye. They are equally warm and
expressive in private, whereas in public, they’re more reserved and contained.
The standard Asian handshake is more of a handclasp. It lasts between 10–12
seconds and is rather limp. This contrasts with the North American hand-
shake that lasts approximately 3–4 seconds and is firm.
The Chinese are more comfortable greeting another person with a handshake
than in many other Far Eastern countries. A slight nod or bow is also a proper
form for greetings and departures. Wait for them to initiate the gesture and
follow their lead. However, the Chinese don’t like being touched by people
they don’t know. This is especially true of older people and individuals in
important positions. If in doubt, leave out the double-handed handshake.
Acknowledging the no-touching rule ...............................................
Although in many Far Eastern countries, people greet one another by shaking
hands, the Japanese have an aversion to informal bodily contact. Japanese
doing business in the West force themselves to shake hands although they
may feel uncomfortable doing so. In their own country, the usual form of
greeting is a long, low bow from the waist and a formal exchange of business
cards. Though young people are defying the norms of their parents, be aware
that the Japanese traditionally disapprove of male-female touching in public.
If you feel awkward bowing to a Japanese colleague or customer, seeing it as
a sign of subservience, do it anyway. That is, if you want to make a favourable
impression. What you are saying by this gesture is that you value that
person’s experience and wisdom. Never put your hand or hands in your
pockets when you’re bowing, shaking hands, or giving a speech because
doing so is considered to be extremely rude in Japan.
Chapter 15: Crossing the Cultural Divide 247