3.4 LET GO OF EVOLUTIONARY HANG-UPS
We Can Change and Reprogram Ourselves
All this talk of evolution has revealed that we humans have many
instinctive and unconsciously learned behaviors. But I‘m not a ―determinist‖
who thinks we have no control over our lives.
We can change our thinking and reprogram our behavior to some degree.
To do so, however, it's important to admit, recognize, and learn about
these concepts... in order to take the most effective control of them and
prevent more unwanted programming. It's even possible to reprogram others,
even without them or us realizing it.
Let‘s look at some of the patterns that made sense at one time in our
evolution but which are now limiting us from reaching our full potential.
Competition
Put aside any judgments about the ―fairness‖ of how women think and act.
Remember, a woman‘s constant game-playing is her way of testing for
strength and integrity... and ensuring that you‘re really who you say you are.
If you take this natural drive personally, you‘re going to feel negativity,
which will only reveal your weaknesses and block your strength. If you can see
it as something women have no control over and so use with all men
regardless, you won‘t be offended and won‘t be set back by it.
In fact, men have the same drive to find the best mate. Since women are
normally the sexual selector, men express it differently. Why don't men settle?
Why don't we just get a mail order bride who would consider any U.S. income
"rich"? Our drive to compete for the best mate is what‘s behind this social
stigma.
When a woman tests you, try this way of responding: Give her an amused
smile that you recognize she‘s still being controlled by a pre-programmed
drive that she just can‘t control.