PC Gamer - UK (2021-12)

I

magineif,insteadofanice-capped
mountain at the start of an Indiana
Jones film, you saw a heap of soiled
nappies. That’s sort of what it feels
like losing the original ‘Paris in the
fall...’ intro in the director’s cut of
Broken Sword. But the disgust soon
subsides once you start poking
around in drawers and uncovering
hints about medieval jiggery-pokery.
Purists might sneer at sanitised
cutscenes and the removal of some of
the game’s sterner elements. But it’s
lovely to play and Broken Sword is
still one of gaming’s great stories; an
unfurling conspiracy based on
Templar history, made years
before Dan Brown farted out
his tepid prose.

BROKEN SWORD: SHADOW

OF THE TEMPLARS DC

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T

heCursedCrusadeisthegame I

would have made if, somehow, I

had mastered game development and

medieval history aged eight. It’s not

enough to set it during the Fourth

Crusade, a pivotal time that led to the

Sack of Constantinople, lasting

East-West religious schism, and the

ascendancy of Islam in the Holy

Land. Nope. As well as that, we need

hereditary curses, undead soldiers,

and a version of Death who looks like

he was doodled by Todd McFarlane.

It’s a smothering, feculent morass of

frail characterisation, miserable

banter, and combat that feels like

filing cabinets trying to screw.Which,

now I think about it, is

somehow still more appealing

than The Cursed Crusade.

THE CURSED CRUSADE

47

F

inallygettingtowatch The

Green Knight gave me the urge

for some folksy Arthurian adventures,

and few games do it more elegantly

than Inkle’s Pendragon. But instead of

Dev Patel being damp on a hillside

for two hours, this offers a poetic,

tactical take on the Matter of Britain.

And like the most unyielding versions

of classic folktales, many of my

journeys end in the filth on the road

to Camlann, long before Mordred

even realises he’s won. Not

altogether satisfying, then,

but perfect fayre for a land of

mist and phantoms.

PENDRAGON

78

THEY’RE BACK

EXPECTTOPAY
£15

DEVELOPER

TaleWorlds

PUBLISHER

In-house

NEED TO KNOW

S

ometroublingthoughtsrise

to the surface after too much

time spent playing Mount and

Blade. How many PC Gamer

features would I need to write to

fund my own mercenary army? Is

Warband, with its emergent

balance of trade and conquest,

really just a pseudo-medieval

analogue of modern commerce?

Even having sunk hours into Mount

and Blade, the freedom of it can still

be intimidating. You can trade, fight

brigands, or just deliver sheep. You

start with a merry band of fighters

but can grow to rule entire provinces.

The journey from tiddler to

minnow is a compelling, often

humbling experience: just as you

start to think you’re a moderately big

fish, some feudal whale shark swims

past and swallows you whole. An

example: early on, swelled by recent

victoriesandspectreoffeeblelooters

fleeing from me on sight, I decide to

help out an embattled village by

training their peasants to fight. This,

for some reason, involves us sparring

in our underwear. The problem is

that the bandits aren’t intimidated by

nearly-naked stick-welding yokels.

And, in fact, they seem to consider

the whole thing an insulting act of

defiance. They attack. I charge into

the fray, expecting to mow down the

bandits before they can bludgeon the

newfound confidence out of my

peasants... but I’m soon waylaid and

my trusty vanguard has to drag me

from the battle. The fact that ‘at least

I didn’t get taken hostage’ is a bonus

gives you some indication of my fall

from grace. Few games teachyouthat

you can’t save everyone

(or, in my case, anyone)

with quite the brutality of

Mount and Blade.

BANDIT AID

Learning humility in MOUNT AND BLADE: WARBAND

BELOW: (^) Naked, freezing bandits: my kind of enemy.
“To die with honour
is better than to
escape diagonally.”
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