22 SECRETS OF SHAMANISMrelationships, since they are usually emotionally charged.
For example, you would probably have more difficulty re-
maining detached in a shamanic process if you were asking
about a quarrel you had with a member of your family. You
would find it easier to ask about the weather or someone
else's family affairs.
Shamanism takes this concept of detachment one step fur-
ther. Not only are you required to surrender your attachment
to achieve success, but you must also accept what comes in
its place. Even if the information you receive during a jour-
ney does not seem useful to you, accept it graciously and do
not resist or judge it. You may realize later the real value of
what you experienced. For example, in response to your
quest for clarity about a relationship problem you may see a
bird circling round and round during your journey. You
could dismiss this apparition as irrelevant or nonsensical or
you could keep it in mind as a potential key to your dilemma.
Later you may realize that the problem stems from your per-
sistence in approaching that person the same way every time,
just like a bird going round and round.
Shamans acknowledge that surrender and detachment are
perhaps the most difficult concepts to master. Thus humor is
used a great deal as an integral part of their advising process.
Laughing helps in detachment by releasing stuck emotions
and can be quite literally "the best medicine." It is difficult to
remain identified with and intensely emotional about a situa-
tion when humor enters into the picture. Shamans know this
and stress the importance of infusing their work with the
humorous aspect. They invariably turn into clowns, acting
out an exercise with wild gesturing, dancing, and singing.
Western anthropologists used to think shamans were crazy
because they seemed to laugh about everything. Crazy, per-
haps; insane, hardly. Only truly sane people are able to laugh
at the troubles humans get themselves into. The world of the
spirit self is the true source of all amusement. Therefore, you
will find that the advice you get from that inner world is
often highly amusing, even teasing about your predicament.
The breakup of a relationship is never an easy experi-
ence, and for Andrea Clover it was downright debilitating.
Andrea had been morose for weeks now: her writing ca-
reer on hold; her letters unanswered; her social life dead
in the water. Andrea felt so shocked about Jacque's sud-
den change of heart that she had been unable even to
cry about her feelings of rejection.