Four Four Two - UK (2021-12)

UPFROnT

T-shirt of choice for Star Tweet and A4 print of

WIN! choice for Spine Line, courtesy of Art of Football

332 SPINE LINE: “‘122, 131, 111’ are the combined goal hauls that Messi, Suarez and Neymar

posted in their three seasons together at Barça,” emails Chris Dowsett. Oh yes, sir. #FFTSpineLine

WHAT’S THE WEIRDEST THInG YOU’VE EVER SEEn SOMEOnE BRInG TO A MATCH?

“I’M OFF” Denis Cheryshev’s dad quit as the coach

of Swedish side Eskilstuna after just three hours. “He

wanted to make lots of changes,” said the chairman

At a Chicago Fire game in MLS

and simply bringing a drum wasn’t

enough for this boy!

@munro0007

I once took a bag full of laundry into

Sparta Rotterdam vs ADO Den Haag,

but due to necessity and not choice.

@GoldenVision90

I refereed a Sunday League game

and the away team brought their

mascot, which was a goldfish in

a bowl. Their captain got injured,

so an ambulance was called out.

Both captain and goldfish went to

hospital together.

@Snakeeyes7475

In the late ’90s, one of our site mods

helped to transport French defender

Stephane Pounewatchy’s computer

(no laptop!) in two carrier bags, via

supporters’ bus, to Cambridge as he

was going home for the weekend

and had forgotten it.

@TheCumbriansNet

This guy was not a reporter.

@AlbertTatlock20

@FOURFOURTWO ASKS...

In 2010, I took some crocodile meat

to Sheffield Wednesday’s relegation

decider against Crystal Palace.

@RedOwl14

Backpack with a few spanners and

other tools I’d forgotten were in

there. Had to promise not to

throw them at the players.

@daskauffmann

A teapot. The person was

me. It was a birthday gift.

@tonymgc

I once saw someone leave their

seat 30 mins into the game to go to

the butchers. They then came back

with 15 mins to go. I couldn't believe

it – this was at Celtic Park and when

he came back it was just as if it was

the norm. Bag of meat with him for

the Mrs after the game.

@walkeradam1

My mate was doing a Mexican

day at work and wanted something

fitting to borrow, so I took my

Clint Eastwood-style poncho to an

evening match against Chelsea.

It was a pretty dull 0-0, but I was

both warm and in Wild West style.

@KeithY2Dickie

A full-sized stuffed alsatian, Barnet

vs Rochdale. He had it barking at the

local coppers.

@mark_widdop

An uncooked gammon steak.

@aidanbegley

I once had a very heavy night at

a wedding the day before a game,

and took a bucket in case I needed

to throw up. The game was Stoke

losing to Man City for both teams

to drop to the third tier in 1998,

so the result did not improve my

hangover one bit.

@caribbeanpotter

Pig’s head – Buxton vs FC United.

@AidieT3

they’re very pleased with what we’ve
done so far, but you never know what
that next challenge could be. Football
changes very quickly.

What change would you most like
to see in football management?
It won’t happen, but if a manager
starts the season then they should be
allowed to finish it. That would stop
all the clamour when you lose a few
matches, because the fans know that
you’re there for the season. OK, there
might be some unpopular managers
by May, but you would have that time.
As it is, owners get twitchy whenever
a team loses a few games, the social
media builds up and criticism starts
flying here, there and everywhere.
When you’re in the dugout and you
feel that other people don’t want you
there, that’s the toughest part of the
game. However, when you’re winning
and you’re on the grass improving
players, it’s the greatest sport in the
world, it really is.

You’ve said that you would have run
through a brick wall for whichever
coach you worked for. Do all players
think like that?
Not everybody, but a lot of them do.
Let me tell you this story. I had Gary
Cahill playing for me at Bolton and he
was going to Chelsea. I didn’t want to
lose him because it was the January
window, but he was out of contract in
the summer. Bolton were going to take
£6 million for him due to his contract
situation, and I’d told the chairman,
Phil Gartside – God rest his soul – that
we needed him until the summer as
he was such a fantastic player. Long
story short: the deal was agreed on
the Monday night and I phoned Gary
to tell him. I wished him all the best
and told him he was an unbelievable
player, but more importantly a great
person. He said, “It’s all right, gaffer,
I’ll see you tomorrow night.” I couldn’t
believe what I was hearing. I said, “No
Gary, we’ve agreed the deal – it’s all
gone through.” He said he was going
to play for Bolton one more time and
would sign the deal after the match.
We played Everton away – you might
remember it because goalkeeper Tim
Howard scored – and Gary bagged the
winner. That tells you everything you
need to know about Gary, and there
are plenty of other guys just like him.
Richard Edwards

A double-sided

painted watercolour

of the Amex on the

day Brighton won

promotion to the

Premier League.

@wearebrighton

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