DECEMBER 18
Therefore it is not God’s will that when we feel pain we
should pursue it in sorrow and mourning over it, but that
suddenly we should pass it over, and preserve ourselves in
the endless delight which is God.
—JULIAN OF NORWICHEasier said than done, right?
Sometimes we may feel, on some level, that if we relin-
quish our grieving, the work of grieving will be neglected,
our loved one honored less than he or she deserves, our own
grief somehow not given enough weight.
But maybe, at least for a time, we can step back from our
grief and in a way “trust the universe” to take care of it. If
creation is one, then no grief—as no joy—is lost. We need
to grieve, but our loved one does not need that from us. Nor
does God need for us, in our small corner of the universe,
to restore the balance of the world by matching our grief to
the degree of our loss.
Think of the phrase in traditional folk religion: “Give it
over”—hand it to God. By so doing, lighten your burden,
confident that God knows better than we what to do with
all that—probably has already done it.
If we can put our trust in God, then, after our grieving, we can
return to life with confidence and joy.