200 I Can Read You Like a Book A
something has to be compromised. It will likely be the high-end
polished body language, as we forget someone may be looking.
The Airport
The airport has another pronounced effect because people are
so disengaged from others. You walk from terminal to terminal,
often without noticing others. The body language is artificial, in part
because people are pack animals at the airport. You have the
unnatural task of carrying or rolling an additional 50 pounds behind
you and hurrying to make a schedule. Think back to the discussion
of focus: If you are in the airport for the first time, or one of the first
few times, you are still out of place and that shows in your body
language. The seasoned traveler (at least the ones who don’t thrive
on anxiety) arrives with just the right amount of time to get to her
destination; moving around the airport seems as comfortable as
walking from one office to another. Regardless of the sensibility,
the airport is not usually a social engagement.
Church, work, or other formal setting
Church may be the ultimate in formal settings with its rituals
clearly defined. If it is the most formal for fear of retribution from
God, at least God forgives; bosses rarely do. When I watched Sun-
day Mass from Notre Dame University as part of my research, I
was struck by how many people followed the ritual, but looked
thoroughly indifferent. Can you imagine sitting in front of your boss
with this body language? If so, what about the CEO of your company?
Is it natural for the alpha to make you uncomfortable? At work, the
trappings of the alpha are omnipresent. Clandestine routines emerge
